5 Simple Steps Special Needs Moms Can Use to Eliminate (Some of the) Chaos
It is Monday morning, and yet again the list of endless tasks to get done all before 8 am is overwhelming, to say the least! Not to mention the incidents and crises that occur because there is a bump in their sock, the outfit is not the one they wore yesterday or that their stomach aches from the anxiety of the thought of going to school! How on earth do you get it all done and everyone, fed, clothed and out the door, most of the time, without having 20-30 mini-meltdowns yourself before the bus pulls away?!
YOU HAVE NO CHOICE! You are the mom-glue that keeps the house and kids moving not to mention the “special needs” issues under control when your kiddo faces them. But wouldn’t it be just a little easier to have a little help to control all the chaos once and a while? Because when you let things get this out of control for so long you’re sure to feel overwhelmed stressed out, exhausted and alone.
Now we are not talking about all the fancy-smancy checklists that other websites and articles speak about! Who has time to do that when you barely get to shower or comb your hair every day?! Just some useful but more importantly practical tips that can be implemented easily into your routine so that when the craziness occurs with the sun rising it is just a little less chaotic. And maybe this way when you go to do your first load of laundry and take a sip of your coffee it is luke-warm instead of ice cold!
Here are some easy and quick tips that can be implemented by you and your kiddos to help both your day and theirs be just a little easier…
We know that you have it all under control and know exactly what to do when the phone from school rings or the situation was not what your child expected but at what cost can you maintain the pace and workload of being mom, no supermom, wife, friend and still maintain some sanity for yourself?! If you continue down this road of doing everything for everyone without being able to streamline the process or implement helpful tips and trick to do the tasks that you have piled up each day you risk not only the inevitable breakdown each night but the spiral of missing out on all the joys that you should be partaking in as your children grow and develop. How long can you be the mom in pajamas yelling and throwing lunches at them as they run out to the bus? It will ultimately lead to you sacrificing your mental wellness, health and all the meaningful relationships in your life. Not exactly the place that you pictured yourself when you imagined having a family someday!
But if you could have the extra time to pack up the correct lunches for the right child before the bus arrived you would be able to have the extra time to calm down your other child down and fix his sock before he put it on incorrectly and flew into a full-on meltdown. Having a calmer and more organized morning would allow to even walk with them to the bus, a cup of “warm” coffee in hand and wave goodbye to them as they head off to school and you onto the list of other tasks for the day. This time more relaxed and ready to tackle the list instead of feeling like you just when through labor again just getting them out the door.
So for 5 simple steps that even the most chaotic and exhausted mom can use to eliminate some of the chaos in the day keep reading!
Rise and Shine
Ahhh, morning. Yes, the typical time that the house is (somewhat) quiet in those early hours and minutes before everyone gets up and the war zone ensues. To help get yourself just a little ahead of the events to come, set your alarm for 15 minutes earlier than you do now. In doing this it will allow you to be able to go to the bathroom, brush your teeth and maybe even make a cup of coffee before the kids get up! Take a few moments to look at the schedule/calendar so if last-minute changes to the snack they are bringing or clothes they are wearing need to be made you can.
If you are even more adventurous and have this 15-minute thing down pat, add 10, 15 minutes or even the full time it takes for you to shower and get dressed! You would be almost a day ahead of them before they wake up!
The MOST Important Things
For those important things that you have to have and need daily, sometimes in a moments notice when the school calls, it is good to keep them in the same place all the time – your keys and purse! This will help eliminate those times when you need to get out of the house quickly and the search and treasure hunt for one or both of them take up precious time you don’t have! There are several options to make this process simpler. For instance, a specific hook or rack next to the door that you come in so that the first thing you do is put your purse and keys on it. Your eye height seems to help too and is much safer to stay away from all those little hands. Another suggestion is one that can be used at home or when you are out! Get a D-Clip or Carabiner, (D-Clips are usually cheaper and will cost under $1.00) and attach it to your purse. Once out of the car clip your keys to the purse so that they are easily accessible instead of having to dig around your purse to find them. They come in many colors too so you can even try and match your purse or bag!
Kids Zone
It is true. One kid has so much….stuff! So, in adding more kids to the mix not to mention your spouse or any pets it is a wonder your house is not on an episode of hoarders! Have a specific place for each child for their things, especially at the entry door. A bin, a basket or even a shelf or hook so they can put their shoes and bag and jackets in them. If you are lucky and have a wall for each child give them that designated side or area. On a rainy day, go ahead and let them be creative and decorate their bin or box too. This way when they come in from school, playing or just being out, their shoes come off and go right into THEIR place. This may just help them actually find both of their shoes quickly once in a while when you have to get out the door.
Use Them Too
My dad always used to joke when people asked why did they have 4 kids and he would say “So they can help us with chores of course!” It always would get a chuckle from the adults but there was so much hidden truth behind it. Many kids are eager to help especially if it has to do with them so why not put them to useful and constructive help? As a part of their nightly routine, have them help to pick out their outfit for the next day. This may mean starting the bedtime rituals a little sooner or swapping out shorts for pants but it would help them feel confident and excited for the outfit they want to wear the next day. It may even help your child that has been feeling so uninterested and positive about school just a little more motivated to go the following day. It also helps them to know just where everything is the next morning since they put it there. Another suggestion is to have them pick out the snack they want for school (from the approved snack area of course) and put it in their lunch bag. If they forget then they get whatever is picked by mom, so this means that if they have the choice they may be more eager to help.
Home Calendar Verses the Phone Calendar
Many of us use the school calendar to see when picture day is if there is an early dismissal and other school-wide activities for the year. The problem is, we also tend to use our phone calendar when we are out scheduling appointments and tasks to get done. There are too many times to count when we double book, overbook and have to cancel needed things because we don’t have them connected! Every night before bed take a snapshot of your calendar at home so that you have an up to date version with you the next day. It will help to resolve some of the double-booking issues because who on earth has the time to rewrite them into the phone!?!?
EXTRA TIP – Have other lists too, like for shopping? Take a picture of these once you complete it. We all know how they can be ripped, spilled on or forgotten once you leave the house as well and the phone can be the backup!
Routines
These 5 simple tips we just outlined are meant to help some of those chaotic moments in your day to help just give you that little extra time to put matching socks on and even shoes when walking them to the bus in the morning. However, it has been proven that to make any of these routines “stick” you need to repeat them for 3-4 weeks to see them start to become second nature and the payout that you were hoping for. Don’t lose hope!!!! Start off small with just one or two and once you feel that everyone is in a good grove add another. Remember, the first time your child went to crawl you didn’t expect them to be running so give yourself the permission to go slow too!
Being a parent of a child with special needs, whether it is a physical, emotional or behavioral one can leave you feeling totally alone and confused. But becoming confident, organized and relaxed in your life and with your family is totally possible and will help to build the healthier and stronger connections that you are yearning for.
When you commit to deeply understanding that YOU need to have time to work on YOU it will impacting not just how you are and feel but how you are and interact with your family. It will help to reinvigorate your daily life and rediscover that hopefulness that you felt when you first decided to start a family. To find out how to become more confident and competent in your life with structure, routines and time for you schedule your FREE discovery call with me today!
Discovery Call
For other tips and tricks on how to add some more organization, structure, routines and improve your connections in your life join our Facebook, Instagram and Pintrest Pages!